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Separate behavior from the essence of the loved one. Each of us is far more than our behaviors. Behaviors are fairly easily changed whereas essence is not.
Love the other person and focus on forgiveness. We all do and say things we wish we hadn't. Forgiveness can be challenging and yet is a key to successful relationships.
Apologies acknowledge our behavior and can repair a rupture in a relationship. Consider the quality of the apology. Sometimes more than I'm sorry is needed.
Be conscious of what behavior triggers us. Over time, this awareness can reduce the charge of our emotions and soften our responses to others.
Cultivate optimism and good cheer, which generally reduce the impact of challenging emotions. Acknowledge the difficult emotions, but seek to frame them in a way that reduces relationship stress.
Acknowledge and address our own problems directly, then turn your attention to helping others. Helping others expands our world and our problems begin to look smaller.
Recognize our emotions and give ourselves a time limit for feeling them. Then let them go. Emotions are constantly changing and have a short life span.
Think about the beliefs that cause discomfort and struggle in your life. Often what needs to change is the belief or thought about a situation, not the people in the situation.
A pure soul doesn't negotiate to hurt!
Let's go for broke in our relationships and make our interactions with sibling, parent, child, spouse, friend, colleague, and self the most loving they can be. Love each other constantly.
Give the people you love the benefit of the doubt. Know that they are doing the best that they can every moment.
Honesty can be challenging to express in some situations, yet it grows intimacy in significant ways. Learn to access your feelings and express them honestly to others.
Throw away the roles and wishful thinking about our circumstances. Acknowledge what is, know ourselves, and reveal that self to our partners in relationship.
Rather than assuming we know what the other person wants, thinks, or feels, ask him or her. Avoid mind-reading, which can be interpreted as disrespectful. Check out assumptions and intuitions.
Take care in how we present our needs, wants, and observations to ourselves and others. Be kind and gentle both with ourselves and others. If we slip and are harsh, correct the hurt as soon as possible.
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